If you care deeply about your people, it stands to reason you’d care just as much for yourself… right? Too often, the opposite is true. Some of the most committed leaders, CEOs, CPOs, CHROs, founders, and senior managers regularly put their own wellbeing at the bottom of the list. That’s the paradox of the self-neglecting leader: the more we care for others, the more we can end up neglecting ourselves.
When leaders run on empty, everyone feels it.
Leadership is a mirror
Culture is shaped less by posters on the wall and more by what leaders role model every day. If we send late-night emails, skip breaks, work through illness, or never take leave, we unintentionally normalise those behaviours. People mirror what they see, not what they’re told.
A question I love is this:
What behaviours do you demonstrate that could contribute to the burnout of people in your organisation?
It’s uncomfortable, and incredibly useful.
Why this matters
- Signals: Your habits send stronger messages than any policy.
- Permission to recover: When leaders protect their energy and set boundaries, they give everyone else permission to do the same.
- Performance sustainability: Energy, mood and motivation are the engines of high performance.
A quick reset: start with one change
You don’t need a grand overhaul. Choose one behaviour to shift this week and make it visible.
- Boundaries: Stop sending emails after hours
- Recovery: Block two 10-minute “slivers of recovery” daily (walk, stretch, breathe, daylight).
- Role-model leave: Book and take a real break, no “just checking in.”
- Meeting hygiene: Shorten 60-minute meetings to 45 minutes and 30-minute meetings to 25 minutes. This simple meeting hack creates built-in reset time.
- Clarity: Share your personal non-negotiables (sleep, steps, family time) and stick to them.
Reflect & act
- Where are you modelling depletion rather than sustainability?
- What’s one behaviour you’ll change this week to protect your energy?
- How will you make that visible so your team feels permission to do the same?
Leading others well starts with prioritising your wellbeing. Care isn’t just something we give outwardly; it’s a practice we must extend inwardly, if we want our teams, and ourselves, to thrive over the long term.
If this resonates, share it with a fellow leader, and tell them the one change you’re making this week.
