Welcome back from the summer break! Refreshed from a break and as we dive into the final quarter of the year, many of us feel a renewed energy for making changes. Whether it’s embracing a new way of working, building healthier habits, or setting goals for better wellbeing, now is the perfect time to reflect on your commitment to change.
But here’s the question: What level of commitment are you really willing to make?
I recently read a fascinating book, Never Split the Difference by Chris Voss, a former hostage negotiator. It offers a brilliant perspective on commitment—specifically, the different types of “yeses” we give. As busy senior leaders and professionals in high-performance environments, understanding your “yes” is crucial to making meaningful, sustainable changes.
The Three Types of Yes
Chris Voss explains that there are three types of “yes”—and they’re more nuanced than you might think:
- The Counterfeit Yes
This is the “yes” we give just to end a conversation, knowing full well we won’t follow through. Think of it as the “yes” you give when someone’s trying to sell you something, and you agree just to get them off your back. You have no intention of committing, but you say “yes” anyway. In the context of personal change, this might look like agreeing to start a new habit, knowing deep down it’s not going to happen. - The Confirmation Yes
This type of “yes” is a step closer to commitment, but it’s still uncertain. You’re interested, maybe even excited, but something’s holding you back. Perhaps there’s research to be done, or lingering doubts. You want to say yes, but you’re not 100% there yet. - The Commitment Yes
This is the “yes” that counts. It’s a full, unwavering commitment. You’re ready to sign the paperwork, take action, and fully invest in the change you want to make. There’s no hesitation, just determination to follow through.
What Type of Yes Are You Giving to Change?
Thinking about the improvements you’re aiming for, ask yourself: What type of yes are you giving to the changes you want to make?
Is it a counterfeit yes? Are you telling yourself you’ll make a change but know in your heart it won’t happen?
Is it a confirmation yes? You’re on board with the idea, but there’s something holding you back?
Or is it a commitment yes? Are you truly ready to make the change, with no reservations?
We often play these mental games with ourselves. We know the value of change, but getting to that full commitment can be tough. Why? Because real commitment requires a strong motivating factor.
Finding Your Strong Motivating Factor
Something you will have heard me talk about before is a strong motivating factor. To get to that commitment yes—the one that actually brings change—you need to be deeply anchored to your “why.” What’s driving your desire for change? What’s the strong motivating factor that will push you past the initial excitement and carry you through to real results?
For some, it’s about longevity—living healthier, longer lives so you can enjoy more time with loved ones.
For others, it’s about work-life balance—finding more harmony between professional demands and personal wellbeing.
Maybe it’s the desire to boost productivity and energy, ensuring you’re at your best for the rigours of daily life and work.
Whatever your “why” is, get clear on it. Anchor yourself to that strong motivating factor, because it’s the key to moving from a counterfeit or confirmation yes to a commitment yes.
Commitment is Key to Wellbeing and High Performance
At the heart of every high-performance culture is the understanding that wellbeing and success go hand in hand. To achieve both, you must be committed to the changes that enhance your physical, mental, and emotional resilience. This isn’t just about ticking boxes; it’s about embracing real, sustainable change that prepares you for the demands of your professional and personal life.
As leaders, it’s also important that we actively role-model these behaviours, setting the standard for our teams and demonstrating the importance of consistently prioritising wellbeing in order to be our best in life and work.
What’s Your Commitment to Change?
I’ll leave you with that thought, what are the habits or changes you’ve been considering? Are you giving them the commitment yes they deserve? Or are you holding back with a counterfeit or confirmation yes?
Take a moment to reflect on what you’re committing to. Where can you give a true commitment yes? And more importantly, what’s your strong motivating factor? Once you’re anchored to that, the rest will follow.
The Health of Your People is the Health of Your Business
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